BONDED FOR THE WOMB
"she was a virgin?" the statement was playing harshly in his minds. He was not able to think sanely. This mind was riled with the guilt, an undoable sin. His knuckels had turned white due to the pressure of his fist. He punched the damn white bench on which he was sitting.
"She is innocent", Arnav punched once more taking out all his frustration on the poor bench. The guard came to stop him from destroying the hospital property. But Arnav stopped the guard by palcing his hand in front of him. The guard shivered seeing the rage in Arnav's eyes. His blood red, dark, watery eye was enough for the guard to understand that it wasnot the right time to mess with the person. Arnav took out his wallet and handed over few notes of thousand rupee and bunched then in the guard's hand.
Once his anger was drained out he slowly made his way towards his wife's cabin. With slow wobbly steps he approached and stood in front of her room. He made sure that he made no sound while entering her room. Closing the door behind himself he looked at her disturbed sleeping from. Shockingly, he realized that by her posture he could make out that she was uncomfortable. The man who never pained any attention towards his wife since the time they are married, he exactly knew that his wife was uncomfortable. How? Was the big question, which hit him.
He was unable to see her face as she was sleeping keeping her face the other side which was not viewable by the people standing near the door. Her legs rested on a pillow, which was set high. "Probably to stop her from bleeding" he thought and felt disgusted. He was about to punch his fist once again on the door but stopped as it might have woken her up.
Slowly he walked towards her with heavy heart, his breathing almost stopping due to the fear that he might have killed this innocent kid with his uncivilized behaviour.
"Never do anything when you are angry. You will always end up doing things which you will regret later and there will be no room to rectify" His Mentor, Mr Shashi gupta's words suddenly stuck him. "Arnav my boy, you are a gem and you are intemmegent enough to deal with any complexities but one day this anger of your will be the reason for your destruction. Try to control it before things go out of your hand". Another blow for Arnav. The man who trust him with his daughter, the man who was behind arnav's success, the man who was a fatherly figure for him, the man who gave him, his most precious asset, Arnav so easily crashed all of them. How could he not see Mr. Gupta's upbringing in Khushi? How he compared this innocent soul with that ugly bitch? And worst of all, he came to know about his wife's virginity through a doctor when his wife reached in a serious case? Where was his soul, his intellect, his sensitivity gone when he ripped his wife for the first time? How could he failed to notice her tight muscles, her innocent cry, her unskilled touch?
Slowly he walked beside her and sat making sure he doesnot touch her to make her flinch. "mat chuye mujhe'bohot dard hota hai", her words still rung in his ears.
Suddenly everything fell in place. Her moans were not moans; they were her soft painful cries. She did not bit her lips to stop her from moans, she did it to ease the pain that he was giving her down there. He ran to the bathroom not to clean her body, but to drain out the pain. It was nothing but sex that he had with her. He pounced on her flash to satisfy his own need, anger and frustration. He had treated her like a toy nothing else. "Then why didnto she protested?" He thought. Not that Khushi wasnot a person who is not expressive, then what made her keep quiet? Then there was another blow. "of-course" the reason was him. Which wife would want to see her husband going to another woman when his wife is alive? She did it to make him stay with her. She gave which her soul refused to give. But she did so that her marriage was not spoilt.
Arnav looked the other way realizing every bit of things, which he failed to notice, or maybe which he refused to see, to feel these days. But each and everything was clear to him now. His wife was innocent.
Just then Khushi turned her pale, pained, stressed face towards Arnav. Hurriedly he got up so that she doesn't feel his skin, knowing that how disturbed she will get and that was the last thing he would want.
He slowly scanned her. Her distressed face, full of worry lines, her eyes pale under the spell that he had created around her, that cute smile of her vanished inside her white lips, her rosy cheeks blotted. His gave shifted to the painful channel that catered to her saline and his fingers itched to touch and tress it but he held back for obvious reasons.
"How wrong was I", he thought disgustingly.
"baba, Khushi needs you" he heard her murmuring and his heart ripped apart. Despite of his presence his wife was asking for her own father. How insecure he had made her. Will she ever be able to find the warmth in him? Why will she? What has he done to make her feel warm around her? It was she, her effort to make herself comfortable around that beast. Arnav did nothing thought which she can feel that her husband wanted her. NOTHING.
Arnav walked towards her looked at her closely. "My Wife" he thought with affection. But he knew that damage is done and he can never ever mend it. And he also knew he deserved to feel miserable and feel guilty all his life for committing such a sin. It was like a crumbled paper whose creases can never mended.
He traced her angelic face on air, being very careful not to touch her at all. He saw her shifting her face along with his hand rhythmically. When his finger reached near her lips she smiled. A radiating smile she gave and slowly whispered "Arnav ji" a tear slipped down her temples.
Arnav was startled at first thinking his fingers might have touched her, but he was sure it did not. It was his body warmth to which she responded. Before Arnav could move away from her, she held his hand and slowly pulled it towards her. Arnav flinched at her innocent touch. She held her hand near her heart and pressed his knuckles against her soft bosoms. Arnav could only see her, her sinful innocent face.
Suddenly her discomfort started easing out and a feeling of solace spread across her face. Understanding her gesture Arnav slipped himself beside her, being extra cautious with each of his moves, trying not to freak her out by this touch. Khushi slowly smuggled in his arms just like every night seeking for his care and warmth, which Arnav unconsciously gave her after his torture that he gave her.
She rested her face on his chest and gripped him possessively as if she might lose him any moment. Arnav held her back as lightly as he could and promised himself that from that day onwards he will only touch his wife and no one else. He did not know why they did that or what made him commit that. but he did it to rectify his sin probably or could be something else which he was unaware off. Slowly he brushed her silky hair lightly and pulled her more close to him.
The sleep, which she was deprived despite of those nerve-soothing medicines that had been injected, was finally seemed to work in her husband's arms. Arnav gave her his daily kiss on her forehead and remained awake whole night taking silent care of his wife.
Khushi slowly opened her eyes and adjusted her vision. She was feeling reasonability fit and healthy. Her inner conscious wanted to hug her husband just the way she did every morning. Playing with his face, admiring, tracing his green jaw with over night grown stubbles with her tiny fingers and finally settling her soft lips over his and then wishing him good morning. She quickly turned to hug his man when she realized she was all alone in the bed. She started to panic not seeing her husband and then the realization drawn to her. At first she was startled to see around her. It was surely not her home, her Arnav ji's room. It looked like a hospital. She felt a tug in her hand and then shifted her gaze towards her hand. "saline channel?" she wondered. She had no clue about what happened to her yesterday. How she ended up in a hospital?
She was about to hit the bell to call her attendant when she saw shyam and akash entering her room.
"Shyam ji? Akash Bhai?" Khushi felt relief seeing her own people and was about to get up when shyam quickly went to her and made her sit back.
"careful Khushi!" shyam taped her shoulder and made her relax.
"what is the matter? Why am I here?" Khushi questioned them curiously.
"Everything is fine bhabi" akash gave her a warm smile of assurence while shyamn narrated the whole story.
"Look what I have got pari" shyam showed her a container and wiggled his thick eyebrows.
"Pa…ari? Woh to mujhe buaji bulati hai", suddenly Khushi realized that, it meant they have informed about khushi's state to her buaji. "did you inform buaji about my condition?", Khushi hoped they give a negative answer to that. but alas they did contact buaji as per Arnav's instruction. Arnav had no face to call buaji up himself so he made akash talk to buaji. Buaji cried for sometime over the phone hearing her pari's pain and asked about her condition. Akash told her that Khushi was fine and there is nothing to worry now. As per arnav's instruction they also asked about the some information about Khushi's choice of food, so that he would make sure to send her those food, which she liked. Arnav also came to know from Hari Prakash that Khushi hardly ate anything and there was a strict instruction from Anjali that no one would cook food for her. Aranv immediately appointed two cooks for Khushi who were posted in his guesthouse. They were instructed to cook food only for Khushi as per her wish.
"buaji will be visitng you soon. She is getting your old dresses here which you like to wear", shyam said opening food container.
"Khichdi?" Khushi excitedly jumped like a school going kid. "its my favourite. How much I missed buaji ka khichdi" her eyes welled up soon thinking about her buaji. "I am missing her so much shyam ji" Khushi threw her arms around shyam to seek his warmth and shyam held her in a brotherly hug and sooth her pain.
"Pari! Come on now, eat your favourite food" shyam scooped out some portion in a spoon and held it in front of her mouth.
Khushi looked at shyam with teary eyes and looked down. "I cant eat it shyam ji", she said in a low voice.
Akash immediately came and sat beside her, "bhabhi aap agar nahi kaogi to jaldi se theek kaise hoge? Come on now have some" akash took the spoon from shyam and offered to Khushi.
She continued to look down while her tears made their way. A pair of guilty eyes who was watching her far from her sight immediately caught why his wife doesn't want to eat. It was because everyday after he declared that both will have their breakfast together from the same plate they ate together. And he knew Khushi would never violate what he said. After all she was his pretty cute feisty wife.
Arnav picked his phone and messaged Khushi.
"I am eating my breakfast at home. Please have your breakfast soon…Arnav"
Khushi quickly checked her phone and smiled seeing Arnav's number. She checked the message and smiled. Not seeing the message but seeing him writing his name as Arnav for the first time. She felt some butterflies inside her stomach she did not know why. But seeing her husband's name she couldnot stop her blush.
She look the bite from the spoon and ate the portion.
"aaa" she opened her mouth wide gesturing Shyam to put some more khichri inside her mouth.
Resting her head on Akash's shoulder she ate the entire khichdi.
Arnav finally exhaled a long sigh which he held for long.